Hello from sunny Scotland. I'm in Edinburgh this weekend doing some gigs and I'm kind of enjoying them. It's nice being back in the UK. UK audiences are very different to the Australian audiences. Neither audience is necessarily better than the other but they react differently to certain jokes which means that you have to be aware of it and, to a certain extent, taylor your set to suit where you are. I don't dramatically change what I do but I tinker around the edges a little.
But being in the UK and the gigs I'm doing aren't what I want to talk about in this blog. This blog is about 2 specific things that have happened to me in the last couple of days. Firstly there was the woman in the Girl Guides Shop who refused to sell me any Girl Guides Badges and secondly there was the radio interview that I did to promote this weekend of gigs.
I should probably address the Girl Guide story first as I've just realised that my previous description may have raised more questions than it answered. Today I was walking along the streets of Edinburgh by myself and I happened to walk past the Girl Guide Shop. I had a genius idea - why not pop into the shop and by my wife a Girl Guide Badge, I was thinking maybe a home-maker or cooking badge, wouldn't that be a funny and cute gift.
So I went inside and asked the woman behind the counter if they sold the badges there. She said they did and I said that I wanted to buy my wife one of the previously mentioned badges because she had them when she was a kid and it'd be a funny and cute gift. The woman did not think it would be a funny and cute gift. She was very aggressive to me, remember that I'm in Scotland so she had a level of unjustified aggression that you simply don't see in the civilised world, and she informed me that these badges were 'earned badges' and they couldn't simply be bought by someone looking for a funny and cute gift.
I said that my wife had earned them roughly 25 years ago (it has been suggested that I should have said 15 years ago but I refuse to let my wife's threats interfere with my journalistic integrity) and so technically I could buy them. She again told me that I couldn't buy them and I don't think I helped matters when I replied, "yes I can buy them, they're right there behind the counter, on sale for £1.70 each."
This wasn't going to be a long interaction as I have never had an argument with a Scottish woman that ended well so I didn't think it was worth the effort. But wow!! Imagine if this woman worked in one of those army memorabilia stores. You walk in and ask how much it is to buy the Victoria Cross in the display cabinet, what would she say then? She'd make you explain why you deserved it... if you asked to buy the Purple Heart Medal she'd probably sell it to you but then shoot you just to make sure you deserved it.
The other thing that happened this week was me doing a radio interview to promote the run of gigs I'm doing this weekend. I've done loads of these over the years and they're pretty straight forward. They want you to say something funny so you try to slip in the one clean joke you have but since it's over the phone the timing is always rubbish and they tend to talk over the punchline. But like anything, the more you do them the better you get at them. So whenever I'm asked to do one I always say yes because I figure it'll be helpful to be good at it when I become famous (at my current career trajectory I optimistically expect that to happen around the year 2187).
So I got the phone call from the radio presenter (I prefer to say 'radio presenter' because I've never felt comfortable calling them a DJ) he tells me that he's been reading my blog and that he'd like to ask me some questions about it, then at the end we'll plug the gigs. Easy! This is the first radio interview I've done where the presenter has read my blog so I was excited because I thought it would mean I wouldn't get all of the usual questions about comedy, maybe we'd be able to talk about something a little more interesting. Nope. Same questions, but with a slight twist.
He kept on quoting bits of my blogs back to me but phrased as questions and then asking me, "is that a fair thing to say?" Of course it's a fair thing to say, I FUCKING WROTE IT!! What radio presenters need to remember is that I'm using 90% of my concentration just trying to not swear. You being a dick and quoting me back to me in a way that makes it sound like you're taking the credit for having an insight into comedy is just going to annoy me, which will make the 'not swearing' part even harder. At least he remembered to plug the gigs at the end. I've done interviews in the past where they forget the most important part, but he plugged them so hopefully the gigs will be busy.
After the weekend of gigs I've got some time off. I'm going to see some friends and drink some booze. Then I'm flying back to Australia, with my wife. Hopefully she'll be over the little joke about how long ago she earned those Girl Guide Badges by then or the long flight will feel even longer. I'll let you know if something interesting happens.
No comments:
Post a Comment